Left hand still adjusting to your new bling? Here’s what NOT to stress about yet!

CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve officially chosen your forever soulmate. <3

*cue swoons and sighs*

If your left hand is suddenly feeling a little heavier, the floodgates should be opening any minute now. That is, the million opinions from friends and family, endless questions about the wedding day, and an Instagram feed full of wedding inspo, must do’s, and top don’ts. 

While everything may seem urgent from the scroll-stopping headlines, some things are truly TOO SOON to be concerned about quite yet. Before you get lost in the sauce of wedding planning, allow us to lighten the mental load by clarifying what you SHOULD NOT be stressing over. 

#1: Wedding Party Proposals

Yes, this is THE MOST fun. But it’s best to hold off on any official requests until you’re a bit further along in the planning process. 

Take your time to settle into fiance mode first, see how the wedding budget is shaping up, and think about what expectations you have for your wedding party. A lot can change in life and friendships between now and the wedding day. 

Let the dust settle and get oriented before popping the question. Ask yourself who will truly bring the wedding morning vibes, nip drama in the bud, and be eager to support you on your journey to the altar. 

#2: Save The Dates

Once you send these, there is no going back. At least not gracefully. Receiving a Save The Date implies that someone will be invited to the wedding. So if you end up falling in love with a venue that’s smaller than your initial guest count, or realizing your guest count is way bigger than you actually want the wedding to be… that puts you in a VERY AWKWARD situation. 

Most importantly, your wedding date isn’t locked in until your venue contract is signed for. Imagine the horror of sending your Save The Dates… for the WRONG wedding date! Best to hold off until your venue and full guest list are carved in stone.

#3: Dress Shopping

I get it, this is the moment you’ve always dreamed of. The quintessential “I’m really a Bride” moment. It feels iconic; a true rite of passage. Randy at Kleinfeld made sure of that.

BUUUT… it’s best if you hold off on dress shopping until you know your wedding venue and wedding date. Because if you fall in love with a gorgeous dress from a designer’s winter collection, you may not realize that the fleece lining won’t play well with your humid summer date. Or maybe you say yes to the fairytale ballgown, before realizing your dream venue offers private beachfront access for a ceremony with a whitewater backdrop. 

#4: The Perfect Mood Board

This one almost hurts to say, but it’s too soon to choose a color scheme and design a true mood board. Yes yes, the wedding designer just said to WAIT on starting your wedding design. We of course need to know your overall vision so we can choose a venue that aligns with how you envision the day to look and feel. Is your wedding vibe more fairytale, garden party, raging night club, or elegant dinner party in the forest?

We start here to find a venue that aligns with your vibe and aesthetic, but actually building out the details should wait until after you’ve chosen the venue. The biggest reason here is because you want to be sure your wedding design works WITH your venue, not against it. 

Trying to force certain colors or themes into a backdrop where they don’t belong? 

That never turns out as elegant and cohesive as you imagined, and it sure doesn’t help your budget when you’re relying on decor to turn your venue into something it’s not.

So what SHOULD you be doing right after you get engaged?

That’s a whole other blog, but here are the spark notes:

1. First, take a moment to celebrate. Getting engaged is a BIG DEAL and you deserve to take a moment to soak it all in.
2. Align on wedding vision. What do you and your partner imagine the day looking like, and most importantly, feeling like? How many guests do you imagine?
3. Decide on your overall wedding budget. How much are you comfortable spending? What’s your ideal spend, and what’s your MAX budget that you definitely don’t want to go over?
4. Book your wedding planner! We’ll walk you through the rest of the process, starting with the venue hunt and your budget breakdown. 

If you’re looking for a wedding planner or coordinator to guide you through the planning process, you’ve come to the right place. Learn more about JJE planning services HERE.

By Danielle Verdezoto, JJE Founder & Senior Planner